My first delivery!!!

As I scrubbed up yesterday, with my friend, screaming at me to hurry up, for what was my umpteenth delivery, I heard myself saying , ‘oh plz , wat’s the big deal, the baby will come anyways …’
As I thought about it later I was stunned to realize how much things have changed…

My first delivery, it seems like ages ago now…

It was a rainy weekday evening , in final year of Medicine, and a bunch of us students had just about managed to drag our sorry selves to the Hospital for 2nd day of labour room posting. Only one thought filled all minds, hope the PostGraduate (PG) is sweet and lets us go after giving attendance but unfortunately for us that day, like a true OBGian, our PG was in a cranky mood, so that meant we would have to stay till 8.30 at least and witness the miracle called childbirth, unless of course one of the guys managed to sweet talk her into letting us go early, but with this bunch of guys, I dint have much hope.

So it started, the screaming, the anguished wails, the hand breaking grip (its true, never let a woman in labour hold your hand, I realized that the hard way), the gory and nauseating sight and smell of blood, faeces, urine, just about any bodily secretion everywhere, this is how I saw it happen, the so called happiest event in a person’s life..

I think every girl decided then and there never to have a child and every guy thanked the gods that he was XY.

After watching 2 more of these shows, true style, I decided since im forced to see this, why don’t I at least make use of it. So I went up to the PG and told her, ‘Maam please can I conduct the next delivery?’ this question was followed by a piercing stare from my entire unit, that basically said, which planet are u from n what sin did we commit that u landed up in our unit?? and a silent assessment of me by the PG , after which she gave me a curt nod for OK.. as an after thought she added, do u know how to do it? I think il assist u anyways..

So I got all set up, washed my hands as cleanly as I cud, wore a plastic gown and gloves, and sat watching a perineum, silently, while everyone around encouraged, or to rightly put it, screamed at the poor patient to bear down.

Ah, finally the head’s coming.. oops sorry, went back in, not crowned yet, please continue screaming at the woman for her pathetic efforts, tell her “its cause of u that your baby will have difficulty breathing, don’t u want a healthy baby???”.. I mean seriously why do we believe these are the golden words of encouragement, I don’t know, but it’s d same words in every hospital…

So anyways after some 15 – 20 min the head did pop out, I think the PG supported the perineum, I was stunned into inaction at the sight, then I heard a voice screaming in the distance, wait for external rotation, now pull down, ok ok enough, pull up pull up, what r u doing???
As I blindly followed these instructions, all I remember thinking is ITS so warm, like a cake ..
The baby wailed its head off, someone cut the cord, and I managed to hand the slippery eel to the pediatrician without dropping it..
What happened to the placenta or the 2nd or 3rd degree perineal tear , I have no clue….

All I could think was its so warm, so alive, so full of life and I brought it into this world :)